Every year, we have our exchange gift at the office where we draw lots to see who we will give gifts to. Four minor gifts will be given building up to the big reveal and the handing of the major gift during the Christmas party.
I'm finally done shopping for minor exchange gift items. For the major gift, I would have to wait a few days until the person I picked finally decides on a wishlist item.
For this year, the office picked a rather kinky theme to the minor gifts:
Something to make you hot, something for your dirty mind, something too sexy for your baby, and something you can keep for life.
Most officemates opted for the sex-laden connotation of the theme, picking massage oils, FHM magazines, underwear, even x-rated dvds.
Weird that I am, I opted to tweak the definitions a bit to fit my humor.
For something to keep hot, I picked a large box of matches and candles, fire, after all, can make you hot; it can even burn you. I'm giving a pack of erasers to clear off one's dirty mind, and a jar of honey as something one can keep for life, even forever, if one wishes to. For something too sexy for my baby, I wrapped a copy of Stephen Hawking's "A Brief History of Time", which I rescued from the bargain bin last year; nothing can be sexier than the mental farts of the largest brain in modern history.
I do hope my victim, err, my givee, can appreciate the humor I have injected into the gifts I prepared. If not, then she would just have to live with it, as I'm not in the mood for buying cheap underwear and pirated dvds.
I think you have to explain why you chose to give those to your givee. Haha. =)
ReplyDeleteSomehow I can't imagine FHM magazines in an office. They just don't mix. Expect people to be less professional after that. Hehe.
Haha. I think that's a good deviant Idea, di gaya nung nakuha ko sa office last xmas party, til now nasa loob pa rin ng wrapper at box. Isang wallclock.
ReplyDeleteHehe, I hope too he/she can appreciate your gifts. The best of luck. :D
ReplyDelete@ Vajarl: I put in some sort of explanation on some of the gifts. On others, however, like that of the matches, I think it is rather self-explanatory.
ReplyDeleteI kid you not. An officemate got a magazine, an FHM lady's confession special, to feed her dirty mind. She also got panties a few sizes too small as something too sexy for her.
I was given 2 of the 4 already: a head gear of sorts and underwear one size too small. Two other gifts to look forwar to. :-)
@ Acrylique: I tend to buy gifts I personally would like to have myself. If it's good for me, then it's good to give. If I don't like the stuff, I wouldn't buy it to give to someone else. Unless I hate the person's guts, and I would spend just to see him or her get ticked off. But that's a special case altogether.
I am sometimes accused of putting too much thought on a gift, but I'd rather overthink it than spending cash on something that would just collect dust underneath one's bed.
@ Andy: Yes, I do hope she appreciates it too. We do get each other's wavelenghts, though, and I am banking on that, and wishing she appreciates the joke. I've no doubt that when she sees the gifts, she'll immediately know that I was the one who got to pick her name.
Lucky is the person would get these stuff. Your real gift is a good, big laugh.
ReplyDeleteGood day! I am Astrid Abesamis, Communication Arts graduating student from the University of Santo Tomas. Our thesis group would like to ask for your help by answering our survey about blogging. Can I ask for your email address so that I can email the survey questionnaire? We hope for your response. Thank you so much! God bless!
ReplyDelete@ Victor: Wow, thanks for the affirmation. I do hope she appreciates the laugh, but more importantly, that she gets the joke. hehe
ReplyDelete@ Ast Abe: Hey Astrid, I checked your link, and it came out blank. Funny, you openned a blogger account just so you could get contacts for your thesis? I was rather expecting at least an entry thereabouts, or an email address so that the bloggers you contacted can reply to you directly.
ReplyDeleteI used my personal account to open this blog, but I am not too keen on posting that address here. Anyway, I recently opened a new email specifically for this blog. You can send your querries at ShatterShards@gmail.com
Thank you so much for responding.. I already emailed the survey questions.. Thank you very much! We really appreciate your participation and help.. Thank you again! Good day!
ReplyDeletedapat sa akin mo na lang binigay ang 'A Brief History of Time'. tagal na ako naghahanap ng kopya. i have the ebook but its too cerebral to read on a computer screen.
ReplyDelete@ The Scud: Give me a viable gift suggestion as substitute and Stephen Hawking is yours. :-)
ReplyDeletedapat dito sa blog meron ding exchange gifts! hehehe... sa monday exchange gifts sa office.
ReplyDelete@ The Dong: Hmm... Paano naman io-organize ang exchange gift sa blog? haha!
ReplyDeleteWoooow. I also want a copy of that. Seriously. Hehe. :D
ReplyDeletenice naman. swerte naman nung makaka-exchange gift mo. though may pagka-literal yung translation mo nung mga gifts pero it does make sense. haha.
ReplyDelete//: mas ok naman yun kesa undies or dvds. haha.
merry christmas kuya shatter. di ka na yata napapadaan sa blog ko ha. hmmp.
@ Aina: I didn't realize maraming naghahanap sa book ni Stephen Hawking. Who could have ever thought a paraplegic could be so desirable? hehe. If I ever see another copy in need of salvaging, I'll blog about it. :-)
ReplyDelete@ Poot: Yeah, may pagka-literal nga, I had to tone it down a bit, because of budget constraints, and because my officemate might not get it if I put more thoughts to the gift. Still, it's better than undies.
Yeah, naging busy kasi, kaya eto, hindi makapag-blog hop.
i'm sorry shatts, i haven't been able to drop by this site lately. i don't have my laptop and i'm quite busy...
ReplyDeletenalaman ko si chico pala yun naglalagay ng spam sa chatbox ko. if you clicked the link it would send you to a site with naked pictures of himself. it's disgusting. one spam is bad enough..but multiple spams!!! and i can't believe he was on my blog roll. tsk...
thanks, man... advance happy christmas! :)
@ Lucas: People have been busy, in more ways than one. I guess that's normal during the last few days of the year.
ReplyDeleteI see you've taken out your chatbox as well. I think your blogger friend has gotten into some personal trouble and had his account hacked. I don't think anyone would really advertise one's self that brazenly.
Anyway, thanks for dropping by. Feliz Natividad y prospero Anno Nuevo. :-)
it's quite hard to believe that his blog was hacked. i mean it's his pictures in them. and i couldn't quite understand why he would take vulgar pictures of himself post it in a "blog" and send people links of that site... tsk.
ReplyDeletei brought my chatbox down at least here in the comments section, i could moderate all comments.
thanks, man. and advance merry christmas too!
Malapit na magpasko Shats! Hindi ka pa ba naiinspire magsulat? :P
ReplyDeleteMeeeerry pasko. :)
hmnn, every year since I started working, a dagger was always in my wishlist.. hahahah..
ReplyDeletebut I think whoever got my name found it hard to look for a dagger... so I always end up with a new lighter or organizer.. hahaha
i hope he/she will get the humor behind your gifts. :)