Saturday, February 6, 2010

Letters to John and Savannah

Dear John,

Thanks for showing off at the pier by making that jump from 20 feet up, I would have never noticed you otherwise. Since I am near-perfect and chaste, your broad shoulders and near-zero body-fat index would have done nothing to attract me to you. By the way, thank you again for getting my bag from the water, it's my life, you know. How it is that way remains a mystery, but just trust me that I'd die if that bag got lost. Write me letters everyday, I want to know everything.

Savannah.


Dear Savannah,

It rains here everyday. There are big rains, small rains, rain that goes sideways, rain that goes up instead of down. I'm missing you everyday.

John.


Dear John,

The next time you feel the urge to quote Forrest Gump, don't. I've seen the movie. Four times. You don't fool me.

Savannah.


Dear Savannah,

What do you expect I'd write? I hope you're aware that everything we write would first be inspected by the US Army before it reaches the intended party. So don't be surpried if those panties you sent through your last letter have made the rounds of some army base before it ever got to me. And don't be fooled too much about the moon metaphor, for we probably aren't in the same time zones to be able to see the same full moon at night. It's more likely that you'd be hiding from the sun while I'm gazing at the moon.

John.


Dear John,

Let's not write letters anymore. I'm getting tired of the socio-political relevance our love story is trying to force through other people's throats (hi there, US Army letter inspectors). Anyway, you've made me wait one year already, and you'd be gone for two more. That's 24 more months of chastity you're forcing me to endure. That's why I've decided to trap myself into a life of misery and regret. Remember our neighbor from next door? Well he's a divorcee with cancer and an autistic child and I've decided to marry him. I wont even bother telling you any reason or show you any redeeming quality of his, just know that I'd be spending years and years wallowing in depression and burning my family's fortune to extend my husband's life. I hope you will be happy for me.

Savannah.

P.S. When your father dies, can you please sell his coin collection and give me the proceeds so I can spend it all on my husband's cancer? That would be a godsend.

Savannah.



Dear Savannah,

I'm burning all your letters and will try to forget you. But after your husband dies, call me.

John.

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Went out Friday night with my buds to watch a movie; I don't think I need to tell you which. I enjoyed the company and the film. Talking about the film was fun as well. I enjoy being a popcorn critic, maybe too much at times.

16 comments:

  1. Great ending! I thought it would end up all mushy and stuff — good thing it didn't. I'm not one for happy-ever-afters, hehe.

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  2. And I thought this came from somewhere enternets! It was a good thing that I never planned on watching this movie. I mean, I never really liked love stories. :P

    And I was thinking about an old song when I was reading this too. I don't remember the title of the song but it was about someone named John and a woman who married his bestfriend. Or whatever. I don't really remember.

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  3. ayos. nanood ng dear john. hehe. the movie is not bad daw. will wait for the dvd. tipid mode si scud.

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  4. Shats :)

    Nagpalit na po ako ng site. Pa exlink nalang ule pag may time :) Salamats :)

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  5. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  6. Wow. This really made me laugh. I'm posting this on Facebook. :D

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  7. saw this post mula sa twit ni victor hehe nakakatuwa basahin.

    i have seen the movie. =)

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  8. @ Andy: It was good that they refrained from giving it a Hollywood ending. The hopeful, open-ended finish to the film was okay, at least.


    @ Vajarl: The movie was okay, although it felt like watching two different movies because the atmosphere and pace of the film changed drastically halfway through the movie.

    Hmm... Hindi ko rin alam yung song na sinasabi mo. hehe


    @ The Scud: Yeah, it isn't bad, but there are better movies out there. hehe.


    @ Victor Gregor: Wow naman, napatawa ko siya! hehe! Thanks for the viral plug of my site. :-)


    @ Dabo: Thanks for reading! Welcome to my hobbit hole. :-)

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  9. I want to watch that movie...but i'm thinking it'd be pathetic to watch it alone. hehe!

    hintayin ko na lang sa DVD. Hehe!

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  10. i've been avoiding this movie. ok ba?

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  11. a very interesting take. haha and to think i actually liked the movie. haha

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  12. Like Victor, this made me laugh. Wonderful post. :)

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  13. Hi kuya! Busy? Update ka naman. Btw, my FB account ka?

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  14. That's a very creative and entertaining review(?)... well done. I guess I'll be skipping this movie.

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  15. @ Poot: Hehe, thanks! Yep, I was terribly busy doing nothing. Will try to update on a more regular basis. Yup, I have FB, but I seldom open it.


    @ Lucas: No shame in watching it alone, but you might get envious of the couples around. haha! Yeah, go wait for the dibidi.


    @ Fine Life Folk: The movie was okay, but I think the story could have been better. It was mature, yeah, but for a Sparks adaptation, The Notebook is still king.


    @ Citybuoy: I didn't say that I hated the movie, there are just points in it that I take a certain... should I say... offense to. I don't know, I guess I'm just being too critical because it felt like a different movie midway.


    @ Manech: Thanks, Manech!


    @ Josh: Thanks! The film's no longer at play on the cinema, so it'll be easier to skip. :-)

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