It's been almost a month since my last entry here, and more than 3 months on my friendster blog. It's very unlike me to run out of words to write. And it'd be long before I once again question whether the life I live is boring.
The heavens know my life right now is very far from boring. It's just that I can't make myself freely write about it. Damn this compulsion of mine to automatically censor myself. But then, again, I seldom blog about things that are still brewing on my mind.
I write to get over most things. It is in writing about these topics that I draw out of myself the underlying emotions attached in a specific event or person. When I write about something or someone, it is done so I can get over that thing or that person; to remove that certain topic out of my think-file and set it under the archives.
This logic then follows that when someting is still brewing in my mind, I wouldn't easily be writing about it, for I don't really know yet how I feel about that certain topic.
This logic also follows that I wouldn't be writing about a certain topic when I'm not yet over it. And I wouldn't be writing about it when I don't want to be over it.
Why then, do I blog, if I will only limit and censor myself?
I don't know the answer to that, honestly. I write because I want to, and I will write when the compulsion to do so would hit me. But I cannot force myslef to write about something just for the sake of writing.